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5 Reasons Why Ukrainians Are Fat

e_bezovie By e_bezovie on
Badge: Author | Level: 3 | Food & Drink Expertise:
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Let's be honest - Ukrainians love their food.

This weekend marks the Easter holiday. I'm garunteed to gain at least 5 pounds throughout the ordeal. Why? Because I'm Ukrainian. Now, why would Ukrainian food cause me to gain so much weight over the weekend? I'm a third generation Ukrainian, yet my family works hard to uphold the food traditions of butter, cream and more butter. Let me enlighten you..

Kielbasa (aka. Ukrainian garlic sausage) -- Ukrainians love garlic. Copious amounts of garlic. This special treat is especially popular around Easter in the Ukrainian communities; just be sure you don't stand too close to anyone after eating it -- you'll have garlic breath strong enough to knock the Twilight vampires out. It's best served fried in an oil of some kind, and is the companion to Pedaheh (see below).

Nalesnik (Polish Pancake) -- This "pancake" consists of a very thin crepe, stuffed with three different cheeses, and smothered in a buttery-cream sauce. It's delectable, and hovers around the 1000 calorie mark. Per pancake.

Nachinka (Cornbread Casserole) -- Nachinka as four ingredients. Butter, milk, cornmeal, and butter. Oh, and more butter. This dish is considered the "staple" of a Ukrainian meal. Oh, so are potatoes, but those aren't nearly as fattening anyway.

Holopchi (Cabbage Rolls) -- Sounds unassuming, right? I mean, how fattening could something made of cabbage be? VERY. The actual cabbage used is so boiled down that it barely holds the combination of rice, onion, bacon, and oil that is stuffed inside. (This is my personal favourite)

Pedaheh (Perogy) -- Picture a pastry stuffed with anything from prunes to cheddar cheese, to blue-berries. Now picture this pastry smothered in a rich cream and baked for a couple hours until it's coated in the cream sauce. Now picture your arteries slowly being caked in said cream.

At this rate, they'll have to roll me to class on Tuesday.